Happy Thursday everyone! This is my second weekly chat in my “Weekly Chat” series, and today I’ll be giving you all three tips on how to make long distance relationships less difficult. And I know, ‘weekly chat’ has the word weekly in it, but I’ve been incredibly busy and I apologize. I’ve been getting organized lately though, taking some of my own advice from my first weekly chat, and have tons of stuff coming soon! Anyway, let’s continue with today’s topic, shall we?
Long distance relationships suck. That’s no secret. They’re extremely difficult and can really make or break a relationship. There’s definitely a level of mental toughness needed to go without seeing the person you’re intimate with for a significant amount of time. I’ve been in two long distance relationships, both with boys who have gone to Mass Maritime (where I went to college). It was even worse with my ex because he was from Georgia, which made it even more difficult to get time with him. Luckily, Greg lives in Massachusetts, so when he’s home it’s only a short drive to see each other.
Anyway, I knew when I started dating Greg we were inevitably going to end up long distance at some point. It was something we had talked about and prepared for, so I wasn’t caught off guard when he said he was leaving for a month to go on a ship. I thought to myself “a month? Pfft, I’ve done way worse.” I realized that when you have the connection with someone that Greg and I are so fortunate to have, a month is grueling. The first few days are always the worst. It takes a little while for you to get used to not seeing them every day. I promise though, it gets a lot easier. Suddenly, you look back and realize the time flew by. Being someone that has experienced long distance relationships first hand, I believe in them whole-heartedly. I think anyone can be in a long distance relationship if they put in the effort. But, in case you’re having a bit of a tough time adjusting to the change, I’ve put together these three tips to help you get through the emptiness. And trust me, these really do work!
1. Leave Them With A Memento
There’s a difference between just a gift and a memento. A memento has the specific purpose of helping you remember someone. Not saying that it’s going to be hard to remember your significant other when they’re gone, but you get my point. I personally love a stuffed animal that I can cuddle with at night, a t-shirt I can where to bed that smells like Greg, or even a video. Rather than scrolling back through the numerous snapchat videos and pictures I have of him I like if he makes a video specifically for the occasion. Whenever I’m feeling sad, or am missing him a little extra, I watch it. It’s nothing too crazy, just a minute or two of him talking about random stuff. It’s just nice to see his face and hear his voice. It’s also great when we have to go a few days without being able to talk at all. The shipping industry is a real pain. But the video keeps me happy, and it’s nice to see and hear him say the words “I love you.”
2. Keep Yourself Busy
The worst thing you can do in a long distance relationship is pine over the other person. I understand that they’re difficult, but just because there’s distance, doesn’t make them love you any less. I like to bury myself in work and hobbies while Greg is away. Long distance relationships are a good way to find out more about yourself and what keeps you happy while the other person is away. If you’re anything like me, I could just sit there in complete silence with Greg doing absolutely nothing and be perfectly happy. That’s not so enjoyable when you’re by yourself. Having that distance provides you with a lot of time to catch up with old friends, treat yourself to a spa day, hit the gym more often, or write that book you’ve been wanting to write since college. You’ll have tons of ‘me’ time and, trust me, you’ll appreciate it a whole bunch.
3. Remember: Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
Excuse the cliche saying, but this one is extremely important. Long distance relationships are really great for the above reason. While it’s tough to be away from someone whom you love so deeply, it makes the moments you have together so much better. Sometimes the distance saves a relationship and makes it stronger than ever. It also reveals mental toughness that you may have never thought you had. I truly believe in the saying, “if it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be.” But I also believe in “you’ll never know if you don’t try.” Don’t think just because you have to spend time apart from each other means it’s never going to work. Keep reminding yourself of how amazing that moment when you’re finally back together is going to be. Make a list of activities you want to do together. I’ll make lists of places I want to go to eat, outdoor adventures I want to go on, and, of course, places I want to travel. If you’re more of a visual person, make a Pinterest board! This will definitely make you miss them, but also that much more excited for when they come home. You’ll learn to cherish the moments you do have together and make the absolute most out of them, no matter how fleeting they may seem.
So, those are my three tips to help make long distance a little bit easier. Always remember, long distance is going to be tough, there’s no doubt about that. But, it’s tough not impossible. In the end, it will only make your relationship stronger and more secure in the other person. They also give you time to figure out what makes you happy when someone else isn’t there. If done right, they’re nothing but good for the both of you.
I would love to hear what you all think or if you have any ideas for future weekly chats! So please, comment below! Also, don’t forget to check out my first weekly chat about blogging tips: Mistakes I Made and the Lessons I Learned.
Thanks for reading!